January 1 - 15 2001 Post Archive
January 1 - 15 2001 Post Archive |
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Posted By: IWANG Jack | Posted: 1/1/2001 12:01:00 AM |
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Monday January 15, 2001 Nail them while they're vulnerable, that's my motto. (10:30PM EST) Jack Now, this is some fucking good news. Remember the chick I talked about a little ways down the page? And I mentioned that she had taken some nude pics, and I wanted to post them? Well, she emailed me back and said it was totally cool to do so..... So here's the pics! Here's the email she sent me. yes, you have my permission. i've always wanted to be a porn star for a day. you know, you're one of few people who've seen those pics, so this should be interesting if you post 'em. anyway, i love your site, and one day soon i'm going to do a photo-taking session and title it "jack," since you're all about that stuff, it seems. anything to give back to an entertaining site. i'll get naked and write your name all over my body in all sorts of ways. i'll send you the url when i take/upload them. haha. byebye now. Nice baby! I just hope you're not all talk and no action. And if any other girls want to be one on my girlfriends just send me an email. Slap Ma Fro (8:00PM EST) Jack In cool news, or not so cool news, I was named Freak of the Day by some kid. Well I was peeking around his site and it looks like he's an organized freak. He's got all his little freaks just waiting to be shown off. Check out this list and decided for yourself who's the freak. Survive This (6:51PM EST) Jack
Me and Devon are hitting it off pretty good, but I really don't have a lot of time to spend with her during the week. I'll change the poll or put up a new one shortly. Things seem to be working out pretty good and I'll give everyone a present if I get laid within the next week. Added some new Winter Time Pics to the yahoo club. These girls would warm me up in the middle of a snow storm. When Little Boys Get Fucked in the Ass (6:43PM EST) Jack Your a fuckin saint Jack-off...If anyone sounds like they are whining it is you, you poor excuse for a web master much less designer. Never said I was either one of those. I'm just a kid with a domain and Front Page. My paraplegic / retarded sister can build a better site. Is that before or after you fucked her in the ear?? Fuck you and Fuck TheEd for his apologie...I ain't sorry. And I ain't crying, you half a fag,..it's like I said it's fuckin courtesy and I don't give a rat fuck how many loser web sites ask you for a link, we ain't them!!!! Nope you're just a loser with posting priviledges. Do you think that posting a picture that's been around for years and making a few comments is really going to hurt my feelings? Oh, you did...... That's very funny...... You have a problem with it? You gonna cry Jack? You want me to get you a Kleenex? How about some milk? Would baby like a warm glass of milk for his tummy? you may have smoothed over TheEd or he may be just a simple spineless pussy who won't say anything...but I am not. anyone that read electrolux on a daily basis must have lost his cock a while ago....Bitch! You fucking retard.... I can't believe I even waste space on this shit.... I'll learn some day I guess.... All you people that think Junior should choke on his own cock send him an email and let him know..... Me Love You Long Time (4:20PM EST) Jack I saw Erin Brockovitch last night, and although it's a total chick flick, it's not half bad. At least you get to look at Julia Robert's cleavage for the better amount of three hours. Of course the whole movie gets rapped up in the end and it's a nice Hollywood story.... Based on a true story my ass. Is it in my nature to piss people off? I don't think so. I'm a good pretty good guy, and I try and help people out as much as I can. I'm not an asshole, and I help people as much as I can. Just because a site linked me, does not mean I can link to it.. If that was true this whole site would be covered with banners and links to many geocities and tripod pages. So if your site isn't linked on the main page, I'm sure it's on the links page, or mentioned in a post. There's been many times I've linked a site, and never heard back from them about a link exchange. It's nothing to cry over, and since no money has come out of my pocket, I'm not going to whine. I've paid for any advertising, and I don't really plan on it. And as far as comments that I've made towards a certain parent company.... Fucking lighten up, it's a joke! Aw.... Is some one a little pisssed... (2:55PM EST) Jack That Gay Thing (10:20AM EST) Jack Hey Jack, How is this for single people? This site is for any body douche bag. I hate when people puts labels on shit, or try and group it into a category. You fucking piece of shit you.... It is a ring that single people wear to indicate to others that they are single and approachable it is also a great conversation starter). As opposed to a wedding ring that says you are married. Well just because there is no wedding ring doesn't mean that there isn't a boyfriend or girlfriend in the picture. The concept was developed by a lady named Jan Brandy The Jan Brady!?!?!?!? who lives in Vancouver, B.C. I am helping her try to get it off the ground and there has been a great response. It would be a great way to GETANEWGIRLFRIEND. Anyway, I hope you could post this and maybe a link to www.********.com Thanks for the support and keep up the great work.
I Don't Even Know If I Should Be Updating (12:53AM EST) Jack This is my last week until school starts up again and it's back to the daily grind. Although I complain about it and shit, I really can't wait for it to begin. One more semester and I'll be back in the dorms partying like a rock star. Seems like yesterday that I just started up, and now I'm halfway there to finishing. Which presents my next problem; What the fuck do I do after that?? I'll be like 25 and ready to take on the world.... Or at least settle down and get married or something. Maybe I should register I Want a New Wife now. Sunday January 14, 2001 Following Your Advice (10:34PM EST) Jack After the bar we went back to my place and watched a movie.... I've never been the best at picking sappy romantic movies that gets girls panties around their ankles, but this was my worst pic yet. The Cell, staring Jennifer Lopez and the Gomer Pyle from Full Metal Jacket combine to make the most boring fucked up movie I've seen in awhile. It was a total mood killer, and w/o my charm, I probably wouldn't have gotten any where. But since the movie blew dog, I convinced Devon that there was a better way to spend the hour and a half.... Don't Forget To Join The Club! Saturday January 13, 2001 My First Time (3:52PM EST) Jack So one Saturday morning we grabbed a car and took a road trip into Boston. Since we were living on Cape Cod, Boston seemed like a whole new country. There were girls on every corner and people that looked like they'd kill us w/o a second thought. We parked the car in what looked like semi-safe parking garage and proceeded to find the woman that would lead us into manhood..... Now finding a hooker is tougher than you may think. We must have walked up and down the streets looking for a girl that didn't look to disgusting. After about an hour or so we found one that looked like she could be the one. Now my friends weren't the most vocal kids, and wouldn't have had the balls to say the word sex, let alone ask some girl to spread her legs. So I had to do all the talking. Remember, I was only 16 and I now had to negotiate a sex deal that included us three and her. We finally settled on a deal that didn't sound fair to me, but at 16, poon really seems priceless. She walked us up to an "apartment" that looked like it had been set up especially for hardcore hookers. The bed and a mirror were the only two objects in there. She took all our money and told us to come in one at a time..... Ok, so here's the scenario.... There's us three kids, one dirty hooker, and our money. None of us wanted to have the sloppy seconds on this chick, even though it didn't really dawn on us that she'd probably be hooking all day and we were getting sloppy sixtieths... So we flipped a coin for it... and I ended up losing..... I would be the one going last on this chick. Well, my first friend went in, and before you could say "I wonder what her pussy looks like....." he was back outside in the hall with us. Kid couldn't even control himself, if you've seen American Pie, you know what I'm talking about. So now my other friend goes into the "Love Shack" and actually gets the deed done. Or so we thought. He ends up telling us a long time later that he chickened out and couldn't go through with it. We lost a lot of respect for him after that. Now here I am, $50 in one hand, and a rubber in the other. Do I go through with it, or do I chicken out? Find out later tonight! Come Join My Club!! (1:44PM EST) Jack I'll be in the chatroom for a little bit, so come and check it out and all you sexy ladies say hi! Quick Links: Charisma - NoFocus - PerFekt - Noelle - Codi - Amazon Bitch - Zee - Serra - Laurita - Jerking Jester - Your Link Here - Long Lost Love Letters (1:12PM EST) Jack hi sexy.... after this weekend i could think of another hundred reasons why i love you. you knew how insecure i was to be meeting all your friends like *****, *****, *****, *****... and all the rest of them. i hope i made a good impression on them. Trust me, you didn't. This letter was from like the day after New Years. Me and my ex-girlfriend had gone down to Cape Cod to celebrate the new year coming in. Well, the first impression that she made was that she was psychotic. When we first got down there we stopped over at my friends house, and she couldn't keep her hands and lips off me. I have no problem with PDA, but this was out of control... The only reason she was doing it was because my ex-girlfriend was there. It was pretty funny, the next time I went down there, all my friends were like "What the hell were you thinking......" i know you will hear from them soon. i love you so much. i am so glad we did not break up. and next time dont argue with me when i say no we are not breaking up. just kidding. 2 mins=30 mins in your time but that is ok. This is probably the funniest thing! I was 21 at the time and she was 18 so she couldn't go into bars. So I tell her I just want to run in and get a beer and I'll be right out. One beer turned into 2, and then three and four went pretty quickly. She ended up being out in the car while I was flirting with my ex. It was the best part of the weekend. Oh yeah! I also tried to break up with her that night but she "wouldn't let me" It was pretty funny that she couldn't except that fact that it was over. This might have been the second or third time I had dumped her, but ended up not being able to. i forgive you. i am not mad. i am so totally in love with you right now. i miss you already. i cant wait to see you again. i cant believe that it is almost four months. it seems unreal. but i know my love for you in definitly real. i love you hunny. i will hopefully see you soon. bye ... i love you forever. where is my one hundred reasons why you love me? :) It's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care. (12:09PM EST) Jack I watched American History X last night. Awesome fucking movie, and Ed Norton is now my inspiration to get in shape. Mother fucker looked jacked in that movie. Check out the Hacker Network for some cool movie spoofs on History X and Fight Club. I found a good page that describes what "IT" is. Coincidently it's another site that I write on. I haven't had time to read the whole thing thoroughly. But it basically states that there will now be fuel-less cars and other shit. I don't know about this... I kind of like driving around now, this might take all the fun out of it. I guess not paying for gas and shit would be cool. Friday January 12, 2001 A plan is just a list of things that aren't going to happen (2:41PM EST) Jack
I really really liked this movie. I've always been a fan of Tom Green and the kid from American Pie and Road Trip. The kid that plays Josh was alright in GO and Amy Smart is one hot broad, so I knew this movie was going to kick some ass. I'll give you some of the basics in the plot before I go into the babe reviews. Josh has some girlfriend in Washington or something who he's been dating since he was 5. She's hot and he wants to stat with her, so he tries to make the LDR work. Everything is cool until he can't reach her for like a couple days. Josh thinks that's she's cheating on him and finally shacks up with Beth. The tasty little morsel from Varsity Blues and Outside Providence. Beth is what you would call an "exhibitionist," and tapes their love making session. Some how this tape is mailed to Josh's girlfriend by mistake...... Now the guy must make a three day trip to get the tape back and save Josh's relationship..... Insert naked girls and farted on French toast........
More of Road Trip to come later tonight! Thursday January 11, 2001 Some Things On My Mind (6:41PM EST) Jack I've been cruising through this site and I think I'm in love with Dinkee. She's a hot little Asian girl, and we all know how much I love them. Besides Dinkee there's a porn movie review section, so you'll know what to get next time you hit your local porn store. It's information you'll need. Do you love Funny Pictures? Yeah me too! So check out this site. Some kid sent me some pictures for this website and I was going to post them until I saw the URL address at the top. I checked out the site and it had me cracking up. Doesn't get any better than that! This is the Funniest Site Ever (5:52PM EST) Jack I'm still looking for those pictures ladies! Don't you want to be included in the Jack's Girlfriend pages? I don't think there is any better comment a person could give you. Millions of people will drool at the site of your tits with my name on it! It looks like Devon is going to win the dating contest. I'll post the winner tomorrow night. This is going to be the start of something pretty cool. You're going to be in control of the whole relationship. I'll post what happens after you vote, so I better fucking get laid!! I still with you people would vote for Samantha, but it looks like you don't want to make Jack happy. Any one going to the garageDogs show this weekend? I've got some of their CDs coming to me soon, so I'll be able to post some mp3s. In the meantime why don't you buy some of their shit. It's good stuff and guaranteed to make you laugh. Or at least listen to their song. Maybe I'll bring my camera to the show and get some pictures with the band.
Wednesday January 10, 2001 It's a Close Race (11:26PM EST) Jack In other cool news I organized the Jack's Girlfriend pages. All the pictures I've ever received from girls with my name or my site address are there. If you want your tits, ass, or anything else displayed there just give me an email. You'll be on display for the whole world to see.... Well, maybe just some horny guys. Looks like the Jackster might be taking a little road trip this weekend. Check this cool shit out. Well I know where I'm going to be on the 13th. If you're in the Boston area I totally recomend that show up for this appearance. You can buy their music here, and listen to their song about the homo Greg Louganis. Quick Links: Explicit Wrestling - Free Porn - DotCult - Daign - Half Honk - I am Jack's smirking revenge. (6:42PM EST) Jack Each night I'll post a question, such as, "Should I call her tonight?" or "Should I make plans with her for this weekend?" You, the readers will vote, and I'll follow the majority of the votes. Now I've got some one else to blame if I don't laid. So check out the girls, and let's see which one will get to call Jack her own.
Tuesday January 9, 2001 Ex-Girlfriend Mail (11:28PM EST) Jack I pretended you were sleeping with me last night and I tryed to feel your touch but it was just so hard but nevertheless you were there. I miss sleeping with you so much and the first night I get back I'm not going to let go of you the whole night and I probably won't be able to sleep either because I will want to keep on kissing you. I await that day and night so much it is driving me crazy. I miss you like crazy and this seperation is driving me crazy. I don't want to ever be away from you again! Well enough of my craziness I love you and miss you the most and I'm so excitied to see if they get a computer because that would be unreal. Anyways I will be off seeing as you are too busy for me(just kidding) and missing you so badly it is breaking my heart. You might not be able to hear my heart beat when I get home because it will be broken. Ok I love you always xxx ooo I was talking with a guy on AIM and we got in a discussion about love letters shit like that. How like when you're in love this seems like the sweetest and best thing in the world.. But after you break up or even just when things cool off it seems like the gayest. I don't read any of the old emails that I sent before, and I'm not about to start. I might devote a whole page to this crap if people keep sending in their emails and people want to read mine....... In the meantime check out these sites. Lesbian Make Out Movies, and Jack's postings on a new site. She's All That (7:36PM EST) Jack
This isn't going to be your normal movie review in the sense where I'll discuss the plot and the character developement and shit like that. There are many other sites which do that, and probably do it better. So for my movie review we'll discuss the hot chicks that star in the movie.
There's like a couple of other hot broads in the movie. But these two are really the stars. I guess by the end of the movie you're supposed to hate Taylor and think that Laney is the hottest shit on the planet. And well, IMHO, Laney is the hottest shit, and I'd give my left thumb to tap that ass. She's got some new movie coming out this weekend, and even though it stars her and Claire Forlani. I'm probably going to pass on seeing it, but you never know. Look for a Boys and Girls Review coming soon. Fuck Boys and Girls, I want Porn! More Long Lost Love Emails (7:11PM EST) Jack Hi sweetie. You wanted a good note so here it is. Baby, I love you. You mean so much to me. I don't want to ever lose you. The note from yesterday was just because i need a little reassurance about your love for me. I have no doubts at all about my love for you. My life would be empty without you in it. Hunny, you mean the world to me. I hope you know that. And yes you are right... the next six months will pass by very quickly. And hunny, there is no one else that is better for me than you. I know cause I'm the best! All ladies will bow down to my extreme skills and my awesome personality. You will all want to carry my babies! I don't need or want anyone else but you! You bring such beauty to my life. I need you with me forever. I want to be with you forever. Baby, I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!! No one in my life has EVER made me as happy as you have. You are the sun in my life. I know I am a tough girl to deal with but I hope you want to deal with me for the rest of your life. Ha! Ha! Ha! That's the funniest thing I've read in a long time. Cause I know I want to deal with you for the rest of mine. I am 100% sure. I am totally and truly in love with you and that is never going to change. I just want to be with you where you are. I want to dance in the moonlight with you. And see your smiling face. I love you forever. Forever doesn't last as long as you think it does anymore. It's about 9 months or so, and usually involves the police some how. Remember people send in your emails so every one can get a laugh. Monday January 8, 2001 Reality Sets In (6:18PM EST) Jack Holy shit I can't believe I'm one of the top referrers on my favorite site. Life is good..... I'm kind of at a loss for what to write about now. I don't have any good ex stories for you, and there's no porn for right now..... Hmm.... I have a great idea!! I'll post some love letters and stuff. This is definitely good for a laugh. hi sweetie. hunny you made me cry. but it was so good to read that from you. i do need to be reassured sometimes. just given a little extra love. i miss you. hunny, please meet me at friendly's after work tonight.i love you. FOREVER. i love you know more than ever. i dont ever want to be without you. have a nice day sweetie and i will see you tonight. i love you page me later. by the way my accountant is suspended. Ahh isn't high school love grand. Where forever is like two months or until the next guy comes along, whichever comes first. Notice that this girl needs reassurance. Hmm, constant reassurance maybe? Looking back these emails are actually quite humorous. Although I wont post any of the emails that I had sent, because I was afflicted with the disease I like to call "pussy-whipped" I think I may continue to post some funny ex-girlfriend email, cause this was kind of fun. If you're a guy and have some funny mail that girlfriend sent you, or if you're a girl and have some mail from your pussy whipped boyfriend send it this way. The most desperate and humiliating email will win some sort of prize. Way To Early / Late For This Crap (12:49PM EST) Jack From: Shecat141@aol.com Wow I'm glad I broke up another great relationship. I knew I was doing the right thing by posting that gay email. I hope you cut off his cock and balls and feed it to the fishes. Now normally that would be the end and I'd post some porn or something. But it's not the end yet......... From: Shecat141@aol.com Obviously we are dealing with one smart cookie here. She is just toying with us and not giving us any information. Is she really that faggots girlfriend? Is she really a girl? Who knows, and I'm not sure if I really care........ From: Shecat141@aol.com I hate people. I really really hate most people. But since I must pretend to be nice, in order to get along, I can't take out my frustrations on the public. So instead I'm going to take it out on SHECAT141. She was on AOL tonight and tried to talk to her, but she just got offline. Now you like to make Jack happy right? Well, nothing would make me happier than to flood her email with tons and tons of nasty mail. So next time you see her online give her an IM. And make Jack happy by sending her some nice email. That's it for tonight, I'm going to watch the 49 lesbians make out on my bed and then get some sleep. Fuck You SHECAT141@aol.com Sunday January 7, 2001 I'm Tired (4:09PM EST) Jack From: Aly The thing is Aly, I'd love to have a serious girlfriend who I could love and hold and gaze deeply into her eyes. But it seems like no girls want that anymore. It's much easier to find a girl at the bar and take her home that night. Most girls aren't turned on by these comments, and that could be the reason for the lack of 'girlfriend material' in your life right now. That's just my guess, so if you needed input you got it, and if you didn't, oh well. Now it seems to me this is common sense stuff, but then again, I'm a woman, and none of the shit that goes through our minds is common sense to guys, and likewise for the shit that goes through your minds. I may be kinda stupid, but I'm not totally braindead. I don't think I'd actually go up to a girl and say, "Hey, wanna do some sport-fucking?" I like to think that I know what girls like and what girls want, but something just isn't clicking lately. I don't know, maybe my luck will change. Thank you, and yes I did have a fun Saturday night. Click here for tons of free porn. Saturday January 6, 2001 Some More Funny Shit (2:31PM EST) Jack The Funniest Shit (1:44PM EST) Jack Viewer Mail (12:09PM EST) Jack From: Tommy Girl At seventeen every relationship seems serious. Trust me any relationship in high school is really minor. i am a senior in hs, and he is a jr. this story will more than likely be a little different...even though it deals with the whole issue of family. my family...SURPRISINGLY...is fine with this. my father, loves him. my mother, can't say anything b/c he treats me very good. the shock came when he told his mother. he never flat out told her he was w/ me, but he was spending a lot of time away from home (w/ me) and she always thought he was at a "team-members" house (he's a football player) or out w/ "the boys". since Christmas just passed, it was around then she really found out about me. he started to tell her where he really was all the time. and how serious it is. she told his aunt. everyone in his family kind of laughed at him for dating a "white girl" but then realized that it isn't just some "girl" he's messing around with. so i guess they are accepting it...... This is the first time I've had some email me about the black person's family not really accepting the "white girl." I'm sure it happens more often then I think though. another problem is in school. he isn't the type to go crazy w/ the pda's...and i understand that. but i notice a difference when there are other black girls around. i definitely feel intimidated by them. it's terrible b/c he doesn't care about other black guys seeing us, but the black girls... i think he is afraid of letting them see him w/ me and he is afraid of them making fun of him. i know for a fact a LOT of black girls like him (he is a very good looking kid you have to understand) and they would get very offended if they knew he was going out w/ a white girl. this is just my opinion on the situation, i don't know his interpretation of it all...it's just something that bothers me. but i am just going to let him grow out of it. eventually, he will stop caring but it's something he has to do on his own, and i can't tell him not to feel the way he does. I was once a junior in high school and in high school appearance is everything. If you guys are still going out after school, I'm sure he'll grow out of it. i think interracial dating is a very hard thing to deal with. especially for younger people (like myself). i am completely fine w/ it, being in public w/ him, everything. but if a person is not selfconfident enough about themselves, then there is no way they could be in an interracial relationship. b/c in this type of relationship, you are constantly being judged on your race, and your partners, and then the mix of you two. and the serious interracial couples that have children, wow. that child has got to grow up to have self confidance and not allow his/her differences to alienate them from the world just b/c they are different. otherwise he/she is going to end up w/ some serious emotional problems... sorry for all that reading...but i'd love for you to respond with comments, thoughts, anything... From: Kurt If anyone knows who Kurt is, or knows who is girlfriend is, please kick the shit out if him. He sounds like the biggest fucking loser and needs to be castrated. If you're such a good fuck why does your girlfriend not give you any play? Seems a little odd to me. His email is pallotjockey1@aol.com I'd love to have his girlfriend find this site. Friday January 5, 2001 Hot Broads (6:57PM EST) Jack So I can continue to meet some girls off of here and hope that my luck changes, but I don't really think it's going to. I've got a couple of personals set up on Yahoo and AOL, but the responses aren't rolling in like they used to. I'd be happy for a semi-decent porn star right about now, or even a middle aged housewife. Those are always good for sport fucking. Now for a little information on how to communicate with your good buddy Jack. 1. You Can IM Me: This is the quickest and easiest ways to get hold of me. If you add getnewgirlfriend to you AIM buddy list and then notice that I am online you can talk to me. There are some simple sub rules to follow if you do happen to IM me. I'm not putting these up here to sound like a whiny bitch, but so that you understand where I am coming from. I will call this how not to get blocked. How Not To Get Blocked 2. You can Email Me: This is another easy way to get in touch with me. I have two email addresses. You may either use Jack@iwantanewgirlfriend.com or jack@iwantanewgirlfriend.com if one does not work, you may use the other one. I read every email that I get, and I actually look forward to it, so email away!! 3. You may post on my Message Boards: I have set up a specific section for people to ask me questions. Click here to ask the question that you would like me to answer. Very simple and very effective. I hope this little list clarifies some of the questions that you had, and I hope to hear from all of you. Optional Links: - Drinking Hard - White Horse - Bunny Grenade - Porn and Stuff - My Vagina - Consumption Junction - Pisssed - Thursday January 4, 2001 Mail I Thought Was Going To Be Cool (11:42PM EST) Jack Mmm... Actually, I am not quite sure... did I write you before to your other address? My name is Natasha Fedorova, I live in St. Petersburg, Russia. I have an idea, how we could cooperate to mutual benefit, see, possibly you will find it interesting. The thing is that I could get you in touch with developers from Russia, who will be happy to do a web designer's work for you for considerably less, than you possibly take from your clients (or pay for web-design?), and with _professional_ quality. Also - all programming, Internet-programming, graphic, flash design, content writing, translations, etc. If you do web-design, then you may accept more orders at once (getting a good share from each), and devote yourself only to that work, you find most interesting. Alternatively, you can realize more your ideas to develop, more features to add to your existing sites, and with low costs: from $8, and an average of $15 an hour. What do you think? A possibility for cooperation? Sincerely, Natasha Fedorova. Why the hell would I want to hire some Commie web designer who can barely speak any English? Email me back if you plan on taking pictures with your Russian boobs hanging out, then we can chat. More Stupid Advice (11:29PM EST) Jack From: A Sweet Girl That's cause you've only been going out for a month you brain dead cum bucket. He hasn't gotten sick of your loose and tuna smelling pussy yet. We are compatible in every way. He has an awesome personality and he treats me very well. I think guys have alot to learn from him. Sexually, I can relate him to a god-damn porn star. It's awesome. I get eaten out at least 3 times a week, always orgasming at least 2 times (and I am a hard one to please). 3 times a week?? And you think he's a porn star? You're more fucked up than I thought. If I didn't know better I'd say you're a guy pretending to be a girl..... We are always trying new positions and places to have sex and its very exhilarating to know your in a public place where you can get caught, believe me try it, you get much more horny doing this. If anyone is interested in the techniques he uses and wants to try it for themselves, e-mail me. (girlfantastic15@hotmail.com) Nobody wants you faggot bathroom love techniques. Keep that shit where it belongs.... Out of my site! Another thing- why do girls find it so hard to give head? I think it's great. I enjoy giving it and I swallow everytime. Not many girls I know will even do that because it's "dirty". Myself, it gives me pleasure to know I'm finishing the job and putting him in complete ecstasy and frankly, I like the taste. You're a guy. No girl would ever say that. My boyfriend loves me for this. If only all girls did this, I think this world would be a better one. I once read the giving head tips on I Want a New Girlfriend and ooh baby, they work. I've tried alot of them and guys love it. More should study the techniques on eating out a girl because there's too many guys out there who have no clue what they are doing down there. If anyone ever wants tips, info or anything on my fabulous sexual relationship with me and my boyfriend, feel free to e-mail (see above). Sheena Oh and yeah, guys and girls I have a message for you: If you're thinking of getting out of a relationship but the sex is great, stay just for that reason. It's selfish, but feels good. So what is so wrong with that? Regular pussy/dick you can get anytime you want is much better than searching for it and having to go through the relationship bullshit to get it first. Like I said, you're a guy. I'm Bored (10:27PM EST) Jack Quick Links: Shoot the Stupid - American Jackass - Free Porn - The Spy - - School of Ass - Troma - Arrogancy - Corpsie - Ballz Deep - Orsm - Wednesday January 3, 2001 I Need Some Help (7:20 PM EST) Jack It seems like every place I've tried has rejected me because of the tiny amount of porn that I put on the site. Now I don't think I should sacrifice the quality of porn just to get a few ads, but I just might have too. So people if you have any suggestions, give me an email. And hey, if you want to give me a handout send me some cash to. PO Box 39 Trip Down Memory Lane (5:39PM EST) Jack Version number 2 was pretty much the same as one, but with some more information about my past. I talked about girls that I had dated, girls I wanted to date, and girls that I would never date. It was pretty much the beginning of what you see here. Madame XTC was my favorite woman at the time, and she blessed this page with many articles from the female perspective. I was also doing a little writing under the name the Bastard for College Club. They decided that they didn't need my writings after I posted some news about their financial situation. Version three is pretty much what you see here. There was a little downtime and some minor problems, but we are now back on track. Thanks to everyone this page gets about 4000 hits a day. That's 3999 more than I thought I would ever get. Of course now that I kind of have some fans I want to branch off and start something new. I've got an idea for a totally new type of site and I hope everyone likes it just as much as they like this. It's going to be completely different from this so don't expect porn and whining articles on girls. You'll always be able to find that here so don't worry about losing it. But just look for something new and different. Some Advice I Guess (12:36PM EST) Jack From: Matthew WOMEN TELLING YOU, YOU ARE NOT THAT TYPE OF GUY: If you have heard it once, you will hear it again. That is, unless you change. I have been in different relationships within' the past about 5 years and everything was going great... We were happy, we wanted the best for each other, and we wanted to stay together as long as we could. That is until the topic of sexual stuff came up. We would be doing stuff, you know, progressing physically in our relationship and all of the sudden it would stop at a certain point. We, and by that I mean all of the girlfriends, would never go past that ever... It didn't bother me at first, I just thought they weren't ready yet. However, after a while it began to bother me. I wanted some action, I needed it. And I wanted it from the girl at the time who I cared about. So, I casually brought the subject up. After hours on the phone talking about it, all of the girls came up with the same response, "Matt, I really like you a lot, but you are just not that way. I can't do that with you because you are not that type of person." WHAT TO DO: Well, I say bullshit to that!!! Do I not have a penis that needs sucking??? Do I not have a dick that needs fucked??? Bullshit I am not that kind of person! I would tell them right then and there, "Yes, I am. I will do that stuff. I have desires, just like every other guy." So what do you do? If they say they won't, then get rid of them and get a new one. LIE LIE LIE: Guys, the secret to becoming the guy that gets all the action is to lie your ass off. My problem is that I was honest with the girls. I told them I had never had sex, I told them I had never had head...what did it get me? Shit. It got me shit. It got me a "boyfriend" status. I suddenly became the "boyfriend" type. Not the type to do sexual stuff with. When you first meet a girl from now on, lie, if you are a virgin that is. Fuck that, lie anyways. That way, when the relationship ends, you aren't hurt nearly as much because you know that you lied all of the time. Picking up girls is incredibly easier when you lie, but remember to tell the same lie to all of the girls so that you don't get confused. And lastly, be a dick. Don't be a nice guy. Nice guys get walked over and used. I hope that this helped some of you. It helped me when I figured it out. Thanks. Ummm...... Yeah.... I don't think taking any advice from a virgin is a good idea. I love how he's been with five different girls and none of them would put out for him. Makes me think that maybe something wasn't wrong with the girls, maybe something is wrong with the guy. I bet he still hasn't gotten laid, and it probably wont be happening any time soon. You might as well just start batting for the other team, I'm sure your virgin a-hole will be perfect for Bubba and his buddy Twain. They'll love you long time cause they so horny. I Feel Like Crap (12:18PM EST) Jack I'd like to thank a couple of sites first off. A big thanks goes out to Ernie for linking my site last week. I got more hits than a suitcase full of acid because of him. Some other big thanks goes out to the guys over at Freak Farm. Check out their site for some insane shit. Since I'm handed out props, might as well give some to the folks over at the Campus Rag. Besides writing some cool stuff, Jen has stolen my heart.... Will you marry me? I want to see if this site is for real. As stolen from there. "In 1976 the maddness began, In a small suburb 45 miles north of Chicago, a whore named patti gave birth to pure evil...EVIL ANDY! Ever since then he has made his mark on the filth and scum that make up the world(I'm talkin about the niggers, jews, spics, gooks, dotheads, faggots, feminist, activist, hippies, civil rights leaders, the government & the rest)with tattoos, drugs, women and of course the ultra violence." Boy and I thought I was a bitter kid. I guess like check it out and stuff. Oh yeah last and totally not least, check out Chimptopia. And this lesbian site. That's all for right now as I think I'm going to have to run to the bathroom.... Look for more stuff later on today if I can stop praying to the porcelain god. Tuesday January 2, 2001 If I'm gonna get my balls blown off for a word, my word is poontang. Or if you're a nerd how bout when you hacked into your school's database and changed all your grades from D's to A's. I remember all these things and it's time to do a little reminiscing. I'm going to look deep into my past and confront some things that have been bothering me. And just remember some things that kicked ass when I was younger too. How To Get a Threesome (6:13PM EST) Jack There are a couple of things to think about when you're trying to get your girl to go for the threesome. How into sex is she? Is she pretty open about sex, or does she close up quicker than a clam? If your girl isn't sexually open to begin with, there's probably no chance of her inviting another woman to join in. You guys with frigid girls are pretty much shit out luck. The only real lesbian experience you'll ever see is at the local porno paradise. For everyone else the best way to let your girl know that you're totally into her and another girl is by telling her your fantasies and shit. Now I don't mean saying something like "Hey I want to do it with another girl". This line wont have her jumping for joy and totally wont have another girl in your bed. Try concentrating on what she wants, and play up the whole experimentation thing. If you make her feel that it's more about her than you, you wont have a problem. Although threesomes are great and I'll totally give you props if you end up having one (especially if you send in pictures to this site) there are things you're going to have to worry about. Jealousy is a big thing when it comes to girls, and they like hold sex sacred and stuff. If your girl starts to think that you're spending more time with the new girl and not enough with her, just watch out and shit. Of course it could go the other way and your girlfriend takes up a liking to the lesbians...... That would like really suck and stuff..... Me Love You Long Time (5:04PM EST) Jack From: Fullwood Are you that fucking brain dead?? This page is about Everything / Nothing of course. There is no point, and there is no purpose. It's just me written out in some HTML courtesy of Front Page. If you want to know about me just hop on over to the Gimme Love Page it's got all the necessary information. Watched Full Metal Jacket last night. You know, I almost joined the service a few years ago. I was like 19, broke, almost homeless, and had a shit job. The only thing I did have going for me was a hot girlfriend. Well, this friend of mine told me he was going to talk to the recruiters, so I thought I'd tag along. These douche bags must have been born bull shitters... They showed me nice pretty pictures and told me all this good stuff. Granted I was still getting pussy at home and didn't really want to leave that so I stayed. My buddy on the other hand signed up for 6 years..... what a fucking waste. Me so horny. Me love you long time. Monday January 1, 2001 Tonight Is the Night (6:40PM EST) Jack So what should I do now that I'm single? I think I'm just going to take it easy and let some new pussy fall into my lap. The gym will hopefully be a hot spot, but I'm not really counting on it. Who knows, maybe I'll shack up with my new neighbors next door. You should see these people.... They don't believe in blinds or something. And the wife walks around top less all the time. She's pretty hot for an old broad too. I seriously hope my wife looks that good after pounding out a couple puppies. I still haven't gotten Army of Darkness, and it's pissing me off. A few people emailed me saying it wasn't that good, but anything with Bruce Campbell is worth the $40 or whatever it is. Might buy a DVD player too. The one on my computer kicked the bucket, and I'm sitting here with 4 DVDs I really want to watch. That's life I guess. Speaking of life, what's the fucking point of it any ways? That whole Reverend Johnson dude got me thinking about religion and God and stuff, and like how it all fits together. Yes, I am "Catholic", yes I've been baptized and confirmed, but what does it all mean. Are we really supposed to worship a man that did a couple "miracles" 2000 years ago. Are we to pray to this one "God" so that we feel like we have a place to go when we die? I'm not really sure... I hate talking about religion cause it gets people pissed off and stuff. I can remember one time this super Catholic guy came up to me and asked if I was going to heaven.... I told him sure, and then asked him what heaven is like. These were his exact words to me. Heaven is your perfect place...... What the fuck does that mean? If perfection to me is hookers and kegs filled with beer, is that heaven is going to be like? If some Homo's perfect place is 24 hour Chippendale dancers, dude then I don't want to go. I don't know, I just don't get it. I bet there is a god, and it's female, and that's why I can't get to fucking girlie action...... So god if you're reading out there, I just want a nice girl to cook, clean, blow me, and everything else Eve was supposed to do. Happy Fucking New Years! (2:22PM EST) Jack 1. I got the great news today that "I'm better off as a friend, than as a boyfriend" Normally that shit doesn't really bother me, but this girl was pretty cool. She also threw both of these lines at me... "It's not you, it's me..." and the classic "Let's just be friends..." I guess it really could be worse, but I don't see how. 2. Ended up in a snow bank last night. Now everyone knows that you're not supposed to drink and drive. Especially if it's snowing out....... Well your good buddy didn't take this advice and ended up driving the Pontiac right into a mountain of snow. This wouldn't be too bad, but I spent the next hour and half digging it out. And I was only 50 yards from my house. At least it wasn't a telephone pole. 3. Another fucking jackass took a post off his site and posted it as him own. I'm not going to make the same mistake twice and give him free traffic. Plus it's a wicked ugly site, and I'm pretty sure he's gay. It really pisses me off that some one will blatantly steal shit off a site and pretend it's their own. Don't people have any morals these days?? So as you can see I'm not to chipper this afternoon. There's a bunch of other little shit that's pissing me off too. Like my DVD player not working, and the fact that Nicorette gum tastes like shit. But I really don't want to bore you with that so I'll just keep my mouth shut. Quick Links: Observational Humor - LOLZ - Bad Ass Mofo - Stile Project - |
This is the ring that they're trying to sell. Now I'm not an expert on jewelry and crap, but the ring itself is .925 Sterling Silver..... And if I remember correctly from my girlfriend days, I think that sterling silver was basically crap metal. I'm not 100% sure, but I know that shit isn't too rare. So, how much would you spend on this ring? 50 cents on the Cracker Jack box? Or maybe a quarter at one of those game grabbers. Well, how about spending $25 to tell the world that you're a single man / women. Doesn't seem like the best thing to do in my opinion..... But who I am to judge. 
Beth (Amy Smart) I could write page after page about this sexy little vixen. I must have first seen her in Starship Troopers, but I have to say that I don't remember her in that movie. I do remember Denise Richards, but that's a whole other story and a whole other article. Back to Amy Smart.... The next movie she was in was Dee Snider's Strangeland. She played some chick named Angela and probably got pierced up or something like that. I love Amy cause she's not like most of today's young "stars" (Jennifer Love Hewitt, Brittany Spears, and all the others) because Amy actually shows off her titties. She has no problem flashing them in this movie, and you actually get to see it a couple of times from different positions. It's worth the 3.50 right there. 
Devon is a fellow student at my college and she's pretty cool. She's down with outdoors type of stuff and likes horror movies. When ever me and Devon hang out we usually end up downing some beers and playing pool. She's not afraid to show a little cleavage in order to psych out her opponent. The only downside to Devon is her parents. They were raised like Catholic or something, so Devon is a little apprehensive about sex. Although she's says she not a total prude, "she's just waiting for the right guy." If you readers pick her, you better sure I end up the right guy!
I don't have a picture of Jesse right now, but don't let that stop you from voting from her. She's just as hot as Devon, maybe even a little more. She's a natural blonde (so she says, hopefully I'll have the chance to find out) smart, funny, and can kick my ass in video games hands down. She's also 23, which is a year older than me, and we all know that those older women know there shit in the bedroom. She's a party girl and doesn't hide the fact that she's got a hot little bod. If Jesse wins, I'm pretty sure it's like guaranteed poon.
I should have a picture of Samantha tonight. This girl is my personal favorite, and I really hope she wins. But don't let influence your votes. She's 21, sorority sister, and full on dead sexy. I know if I start going out with this chick, she'll be my sugar momma, and we all know what that's like. So vote for this little hot momma and make Jack a happy man. 
If you're a fan of this site, you probably know that I like those gay high school and college movies. Maybe it's because they represent the way high school and my freshman year of college was, or maybe it's because there are tons of hot broads walking around in skimpy clothing. Usually the story revolves around this quick and simple formula. Boy meets girl. Boy loses girl. Boy gets girl back. End. Throw in some Saved By the Bell hijinx, and you have yourself an hour and a half of pure fun. I guess you could call this part one of movie reviews, or you could just call it Jack rambling about stupid shit again. Either way, here is She's all That.
Rachael Leigh Cook (Laney Boggs) This is what we call the "Hot girl pretending to be ugly role." Even though she tries to hide her hotness under ugly clothes and bad hair, we know she is a total babe underneath all that. After Zach gets her to go to the beach, we get the first glimpse of what a killer body this chick has. Wearing the "old school, one peice, I'm not looking for action" black bathingsuit Laney struts her stuff playing volleyball and becoming buddy buddy with the popular kids. On a scale of one to ten on the Shagometer, we are approaching a 9.5. She loses .5 only for not showing her tits. Now I know it's only a PG-13 movie, but she could at least make one movie where we get some nudity!
Taylor Vaughn (Jodi Lyn O'Keefe) The bitch of the movie I guess you would call her. Basically dumps Zach and starts shacking up with the guy from Scream. One thing I didn't understand was how old was that mother fucker supposed to be? I know he was based on Puck and shit, but damn if he's so cool how come he's dating a high school girl. Well, yeah I'd date her to if she wanted. Taylor get's a 8.5 only because she's high maintenance. She would have received the perfect score because, A. She takes the third input. B. She's fucking hot. Too bad you're just a little to mouthy. 
Ah... More pics with my name written on a girl's titties. I don't think I could ever get tired of that. But I was doing some thinking today about this site and the curse that I'm under. Of course I love the attention I get, and I'm not going to stop writing on this site, but I haven't had like a "real" girlfriend since I've started this thing. It's fucking pitiful if you ask me. Maybe me timing is off or something, but I seem to think it's the area I'm in. I don't really have the time to go out and meet new people, so the internet is really my only option. 
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